photographer. artist. author. singer. songwriter. musician. teacher. student. humanitarian. visionary.

Road Trip!

Welp- it’s official. Josh and I are going to see his family! He hasn’t been there (apart from two times, shortly) in about 7 years. Losing both parents at an early age and then being shuffled through foster homes, he had all of the odds stacked against him in life, and like me, should have ended up a statistic. But he’s kind, strong, loving, and highly intelligent (I know you’re reading this Brianna, and I know you’re laughing!) but he really is. He’s overcome great odds; it ripped my heart out of my chest to see him writhing on the floor last night, wailing and crying out for his Mother.

So, after pulling a few strings today, I’ve managed to coordinate a road trip. The house is stocked with $300 of groceries- Bob’s got his smokes- Brianna’s got her Carl back (he had escaped earlier) and after fueling up, we’re headed out to Huber’s Winery to pick up a couple of bottles of Catawba Rose to go with Josh’s Aunt’s “Wild Gypsy” candle we bought for her. I’ve heard about his family for so long now, I feel like I know them already, and I love them all truly. I’ve been missing his sister, Kat, lately. I feel sad in my heart for her and I just can’t put my finger on it, but when my fall aid is finalized, we’re going to take a trip to see her too.

I had an odd dream last night. I dreamed that I was walking in the snow but it was warm, like a mild summer day. (I usually dream in monochrome and sepia tones, much like my photography.) But last night, the palette was explosive! Wild, vivid colours. I walked into a patch of sunshine: I could tell by the grass’s shadows that it was about 6:00 p.m.- just when the shadows are stretched to their peak (and the best time for photographing them if you want dramatic photos). As I stepped into a triangular area of bright sunlight, the snow became mingled with dollar bills. It was literally “snowing money”. I walked with my eyes closed and a bizarre smile plastered on my face, and when I woke up, there was a warm glow all around me. Is that…is that what happiness feels like?!

I suppose it was a bit prophetic in a way- I was able to access $500 for groceries and a road trip- last minute. Josh is strangely tense. I know there are a lot of emotions he feels right now. It’s like being around a brooding storm without thunder- but a very quiet one just the same. I understand.

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6 responses

  1. yvo

    happy for you!!!! so happy for you. I kiss a prayer your way. Sing. sing while driving. sing your hearts out!!! xxx!!

    August 18, 2013 at 3:25 pm

    • Aww…..prayers answered. We just saw a double rainbow half of the way home. 😉 (It was gorgeous! Great trip, by the way. I’ve waited seven long years to meet Josh’s family- very fulfilling!)

      August 20, 2013 at 8:29 pm

  2. Where is Josh’s family from?

    August 19, 2013 at 10:10 pm

    • Some of his family live in Kentucky and others live in Shelbyville, Indiana. (Nice place- especially compared to Jeffersonville..heheh…it’s a lot cleaner.)

      August 20, 2013 at 9:48 pm

  3. I absolutely love that photograph. I would frame it if I could ❤ it reminds me of what hope looks like. I swear when all my other candles are burned out there is just that one that refuses to go out, presses me forward, gives me something to hold onto. Also, yay to road trip! I'm sorry to hear about how hard Josh has had it. Tell him I identify as I don't have parents in my life either and am sad to admit that at different times in my life I had wished I never knew them… Sometimes we are better off I guess. It's just hard to come to that realization. There are so many times I'm sure him and I both need our parents and they are just not there…in any way, shape, or form. As for mine, it wouldn't even matter if they were, they do not know how to give me what I need. I wish you guys the best though and hope the trip is peaceful!

    August 25, 2013 at 5:48 pm

    • Aww Jen, I’m so sorry to hear about your parents. I can’t imagine what you’ve been through (well, I can, a bit) but I had great parents growing up who were always very supportive of me, for the most part. You’re right, sometimes we’re better off having not having known people it seems we should have. I have several immediate blood relatives that I used to be close to. In all actuality, I can go the rest of my life without ever seeing them again. I’ve learned to separate “loving” somebody and “needing” them long ago though. We have to do that to survive, you know? I hope things are looking up for your husband’s job and hey, keep me posted on what you choose to do with your schooling! XO

      August 26, 2013 at 8:11 pm

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