So my midterm results are in:
Behavioral Neuroscience exam: 233/250
Cognitive Psychology exam: 142/160
Overall results: two strong A’s in both classes.
Go me! Go me! And today is the first day of spring break. I’m alright with that.
Carl Zeiss Jena Flektogon 35/2.4/ film lens Ohio River Construction- down by the riverside
I’ve got until Sunday to cover 400 pages- midterms. [Insert scream here!]
Midterms (and finals) are always so much freaking pressure! I’m still at a B+ in Behavioral Neuroscience and a strong A in Cognitive Psychology, but any ole way you slice it- midterms are crazy. I find myself using straight up avoidance (which is actually worse than denial, because at least with denial, you’re not always aware that you’re in denial, but with avoidance, it’s sort of like knowing you’re in denial and choosing to do so anyway- and yes, I’m aware that I’m starting to sound like a psychologist!) and so it’s Friday night and I’m down to the wire.
What am I doing? Installing Still Life II. I actually get to be the detective and the abducted person who’s trapped in the psycho serial killer’s booby trap-laden house (think : “Saw”).
Avoidance. Utter, blatant avoidance.
But fun! 🙂
And this is for you, Gav. I know you’ve been down lately, and you’re not feeling much inspired, but I want you to know just how much you inspire me. I have so much respect for you because over the past 8 years or so that I’ve known you (originally from Redbubble) but here too these past few years, you go out – day after day- and shoot nothing but black and white/monochrome. Street scenes, people- life. And, you have a prominent talent with shadows and lighting- which I love. I’ve only shared this with one other person, but I’ve decided to devote an entire year- all of 2015- to solely black and white/monochromatic photography. No colour allowed! For an entire year. it’s going to be great. 🙂 So, while you feel “blah” lately, please know that your work and talent continues to inspire others. This is for you:
I’ve been reading a boatload of crap lately, online. A lot of what I’m reading are women who claim to be “feminists” but yet, they’re the very people who are perpetuating gender inequality!
Take for example the multi-billion dollar cosmetic industries: Maybeline, Cover Girl, Max Factor. The majority of the people I see who claim to be staunch feminists are caked in heavy make-up, but yet they say that they want to be treated with the same respect as men. (And stuff.) If you really want to be treated like a man, or- at least be in the same ball park– ditch the heavy make-up. (Heavy is the key word here.) At least to a high degree- for starters. And, go au naturale in the shaving department. Yep. Believe me…you’ll be treated like a man!
And while we’re on the subject…using words like “feminist” is sexist.
It kind of defeats the whole purpose of “being treated equally”, doesn’t it? I mean, there’s no equal male counterpart for the word. At all. Masculist? Masculinist? Interesting.
So, as long as we continue favouring, preferring, and using strong words like “feminism”, especially in 2015- I don’t think we can expect to be treated anything differently than “just a woman”.
I can back my talk up, by the way. I neither shave my legs nor wear more than blush and sheer lipgloss. I may end up going “full commando” at some point (and by that I mean, ditching the lipgloss and blush altogether- but don’t count on it) but I feel it’s so minimal that it doesn’t hinder me at all in feeling “natural”.
While it seems like I’m slamming “feminists”, I’m really not. I just hate the word. I hate that we, as females, have to even use a word so that we can “feel equal”. I say we destroy the word altogether and be independent agents– representing our souls and spirits and inner beauty– not our genders. As long as we’re “pointing out that there’s an elephant in the room”- there’s going to be an elephant in the room.
My 2 cents.
Rant out- on to the midterms!
Dried flower stems in a small vase. Simple. Beautiful.
This is for you, whoever you are. You, who have been destroyed by “the one who loved you”. I too have been destroyed- not by love, but by hate. Because the one that I loved used me, abused me, and in the end- discarded me as rubbish.
Me! Of all people. It’s true.
This is proof that even the strong become weak in the race of love. You can only hope that you can hobble your way to a shaded tree in the end, and take refuge.
I was destroyed by a man who I gave my heart to. And he toyed with me. Like a cat.
With more porn.
With stalking me.
With even MORE porn.
He betrayed me to the depths.
In the end, he destroyed me.
The worst of all, is that he believes that it is I who destroyed him.
Ahh…but isn’t that how it goes?
So I’m moving on. I write this to say, whoever you are, that I too know what it’s like to be utterly destroyed by a man, or “significant other” who you believe shelters your heart- like no other.
It’s a lie.
And on that note, I take my leave. I’m devastated, shattered, and in a million pieces on the floor.
No doubt I’ll be back! Someday, when I’m whole again.
Until then, I’m MIA.
Grey days are here again. Carl Zeiss Jena Flektogon 35/2.4- bedroom window. 3.1.15