Work in Progress
I had a dream a few months ago.
I was in a factory. It was a large factory and I was in a control room with 12 executives who were sitting around an oblong table. It looked like a think tank and some of the workers had notebooks and pens and were taking notes. I too had a notebook and was jotting down some notes. One of the female employees looked up from the table and said, “I’m the boss.” I corrected her, saying, “I’m the boss.” My hair was long and sleek and parted on the side and I wore a periwinkle suit (and high heels). I was able to see the entire factory through a large window in the room and I was aware that I was in charge of the entire factory- including the 12 executives at the table. I was professional and serious in disposition.
When I awoke, I almost cried, because I knew that I wasn’t that girl in the dream. I was aware that i had a long way to go! I understand the dream. The factory represented me. The workers were different parts of me on a subconscious level: thoughts, feelings, ideas, etc. I was struggling to ascertain my authority in that area.
I’ve been through an incredible amount of stress in the past few months, but what it’s really done is given me new feet. I tell my friends all the time that their trying circumstances are the very things that allow them to develop new feet and become “firewalkers”. And, I know by now that the diamonds are hidden among the rubble. Bad experiences are never just “bad experiences”. Every horrible experience is an instructor. Knowing this going in allows me to keep a positive attitude and embrace all aspects of the experience.
I was standing in the kitchen a few days ago, talking to God, when I realized that I have new feet/shoes! I’m still not that girl in my dream, and I still have a long way to go, but I do have the shoes. I’m learning to be patient; and some day, I’ll have that periwinkle suit. But for now, I’m alright with being a work in progress. After all, it’s not always about the destination, but the journey that gets us there, and makes us who are.
Taken today. Perrin Park- Indiana. Super Tak SMC 28 MM/Canon Rebel XSI
m o n o c h r o m e j u n k i e † 
I would like to take this opportunity to say that I think you are already a bad ass fire walker as you are now! AND, so glad to know you have acquired the appropriate footwear! 😀
All kidding about footwear aside, I am so impressed with the way you approach your journey. It seems that no matter how out of control the situation is, you seem to take the reigns of how you handle it. With the way you express yourself through your photos, and the amazing attitude you have about the setbacks you’ve faced in your journey, you are already wearing that periwinkle suit in my eyes.
I know we all see ourselves differently than others see us, but at least on one plane of existence … (my plane) you are all kinds of periwinkle! 😉
February 11, 2015 at 2:31 am
You totally just made me cry! :0) That’s so kind and thoughtful to say, Amy, it really is. And I tell you, I want that damn suit so bad! Heheh… I remember trying on my older step-sister’s bikini when I was 14. (I was so flat-chested that my lack of breasts created a vortex of nothingness in the bikini top- it was a revelation to be sure.) I know that if I try to “wear the suit” before its time- I would be screwing up the master plan all over the place. But you know, when I graduate (with my bachelor’s in psych. in the next year and a half), I’ll wear jeans and a decent top, etc.; but when I graduate with my Master’s in Clinical (3- 4 years from now), I’ll be wearing that periwinkle suit under my robe. 😉
Thanks again SO much for being genuinely sweet and well…for just being who you are. Lots of love to you, hombre! xo
February 11, 2015 at 12:43 pm
Totally love this and am so glad I read just now. I needed it B. My Dad collapsed again and is back in the hospital. In a week I lost my dogs/dogs, lost my fav Uncle and 2x my dear Father has been hospitalized. By the Grace of God I am grieving and living. Thank you for sharing this. xx
February 11, 2015 at 8:49 am
Oh Y, I’m so very sorry that you’re having to go through all of this right now. I’ll keep you in my thoughts, heart, and prayers. I love you. xo
February 11, 2015 at 12:54 pm
Now that’s a cracking shot
February 11, 2015 at 9:48 am
Thanks, mate. :0)
February 11, 2015 at 12:37 pm