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Blur

That pretty much sizes up my mood right now. I think I’ve reached my serial killer threshold.

My alternator finally died (for good) and so I had little choice but to sell my lenses. Not my camera! Just the lenses. The good side is that I’ve fixed my car. The bad side is that I’m stuck with one 28 MM film lens which doesn’t even attach to my camera. Yeah. Hard times!

Nevertheless, I force myself to see this as a positive situation; with much everything else. Having to hold my lens up to my camera, I discovered that I can bend the light in Hitchcockian fashion, if I do it juuuuust right. I get a good amount of blur (which I love) and heavier in-camera contrast. Not a bad thing. The downside is that it really sucks having to hold your lens up to your camera manually.

Alas, it served its purpose, which was to distract me from having to write my 6 page term paper today. About…you guessed it! Serial killers. I can’t believe I’m actually looking forward to beginning my psychology classes again next month. A person can handle studying only so many paraphiliacs before the brain begins to involuntarily shut down.

Which is what’s happening in my case.

On to my paper…

Shot in monochrome- today’s batch of pics: YUS 28 MM film/Canon Rebel XSI- back deck
doorknobMJseedsMJ
doorknob2
blurMJleaves


Brunch

 Organic Coconut Chia Granola with Greek honey vanilla yogurt and fresh bananasBrunchMJ2

Are you a Psycho?

Clearly, I am not a psychopath. Which is amazing. Because I actually share quite a few traits with many of them:

  • Bedwetting as a child (and adolescent)
  • Was a wee bit experimental and unkind to animals as a child
  • Lied a good bit as a child

I don’t have in interest in pyromania, though (not even a bit- and never have), which is a major characteristic of many psychopaths/sociopaths. For starters, I think it’s wrong to destroy someone else’s property. I used to wonder about sharing several traits with psychopaths, understandably, seeing how I was grossly abused as a child. I remember my thoughts being “abnormal” growing up- at best.

AlienMJ

However, I was raised to acknowledge right from wrong and was always hyper-aware of my conscience. This is what distinguishes a “normal person” from a psychopath; knowing right from wrong and choosing to remain within those non-impulsive and non-reactionary boundaries.

I’m learning some fascinating things in my classes. One of the most interesting things I’ve learned is that most people have a good bit of activity going on in their prefrontal cortexes. The prefrontal cortex (located in the frontal lobe of the brain- behind the forehead) regulates impulse, aggression, judgment- and fear, most importantly. A “normal person” ‘s brain shows activity in this brain area; a psychopath’s does not. Psychopaths and sociopaths show little to absolutely no activity in their prefrontal cortexes- at all. That’s some pretty solid evidence that psychopaths are genetically hard-wired for long-term sociopathy, including the development of becoming a serial killer.

There are 3 main traits that serial killer’s share, according to academicians and researchers:

  • Childhood (physical, emotional, psychological, and/or sexual) abuse
  • A brain injury of some sort (whether developmental or congenital)
  • Mental illness

When a person has two or more of these characteristics in childhood, the chances of developing the third one is pretty great. If a person exhibits all three of these characteristics, the chances are that much greater that a serial killer is in the making. That’s not to say that all people who share these three characteristics are or are going to be serial killers. But interestingly enough, the majority of all serial killers do have these three key characteristics in common.

I took this psychopath quiz a few minutes ago: it’s certainly not standardized and it’s not APA-affiliated or approved; it’s a 25 or so question quiz that sheds some insight into what percentage you fall into when compared to the national median. If you score 30% or more, chances are, you’re a psycho!

I scored 5%. I can sleep tonight. ;)

Results

You scored 5. Scores above 30 indicate psychopathy, of course only a professional, which this test is not, can make a true assessment. This test was made just for fun.

Below is a graph of how other people who have taken this test have scored:

download

5.5% of people score higher than 30.

You can take the quiz here- (results are immediate):

http://vistriai.com/psychopathtest/

It’s Pure Madness: And I Love It

So I’ve just gone over my syllabi for the semester: I’m cramming 4 months of classes into 6 weeks. That alone is madness.

My work for this week constitutes the following:

5 chapters in Forensic Anthropology
5 chapters in The Human Bone Manual
1 study guide that requires the memorization of the names and locations of 100+ bones in the human body
2 videos
5 Powerpoints/Lectures
Multiple discussion board postings + citations, etc.
2 quizzes

And that’s just one class.

Multiply that times 2 and then you know what I’m up against.

But I love it. :)

(See you when I come up for air!)

xo

Isn’t it Funny when…

…you’re a kid and see Freddy Mercury singing “We are the Champions” in his black and white outfit, dancing in the white smoke and think, “That’s so Cool!”

And then at like- 45- you see it again, and you’re like:

“His 1/2 black and 1/2 white suit is probably indicative of his devotion to the Illuminati and duality, in general, and MAN that’s a lot of cocaine!”

I still love you, Freddy. :)

I’ve Planned Out the Next Six Years of my Life

It’s a great time in my life.

Josh and I are still best buds; Mandy Tator Tots is making home made biscuits and gravy tonight and Josh will be joining us. (Mandy Tator Tots is my son’s girlfriend and I absolutely love her to death. She’s pure gold, that one.)

My summer classes begin in 10 days, and so I’ve plotted my course in life for the next 6 years or so. When I wrap up my Bachelor’s in Psychology, it’ll be the spring/summer of 2016. From there, I’ll move on to my Master’s in Forensic Psychology (at a school with the # 2 Forensic Psychology program in the nation). The Master’s will be 35 credit hours and will take two years. I’ll then transfer my entire Master’s degree over to Spalding University (they accept up to 30 credit hours of a Master’s) so I will have only lost out on a total of 5 credit hours. Not a bad deal. Plus, getting my Master’s first and then transferring it will save me 50% of my costs, rather than going straight into my doctorate. After transferring my Master’s to Spalding, I’ll begin my doctorate (PsyD) in Clinical Psychology with an Emphasis in Forensic Psychology/Corrections. Voila! 6 years.

Don’t know about anybody else, but I’m locking this thing down with eagle focus and an insane drive. (I have to get my GPA up from 3.5 to at least a 3.8 though, or higher.)

Nothing, and I mean NOTHING will stop me.

So, that about wraps up my semi-periodic update here! Time to get into school mode again. My vacation is officially over. :)

Jwaterpark

Topics in Criminal Justice: Serial Killers

I just found out that I’ve been given a partial Perkins loan ($750) to pay for more than half of my 2 summer courses. Woot! I’m so super stoked. I like psychology- but I’m madly passionate about criminology– it really is my thing.

This is what my textbook looks like for my (serial killers) course:sk classIn Forensic Anthropology, we’ll be studying human remains in disaster settings, as well as reconstructing crime scenes. It’s going to be an interesting semester. :)

Down to the Wire

I can hardly believe a whole month has passed by since I’ve posted anything here. I can’t say I’ve been busy, really; just enjoying my summer vacation, mostly. I’ve had a little too much time on my hands lately and have been feeling restless. Part of that restlessness is knowing that I have just over $6,000 remaining in financial aid for 2015-2016- and 13 classes to go. If I’m really careful, it can be done. (By the skin of my teeth- maybe.) But I was just thrown a serious curve ball by my school. I was assigned a new adviser- a real sweetheart- who caught an egregious oversight in my records. When I transferred my Associates Degree in Behavioral Sciences (and CPC in Substance Abuse) from Vincennes University, I was allowed 92 of those credit hours in to IU East. That was pretty generous, I thought. However, my new adviser pointed out that they’d made a terrible mistake and only 64 credit hours were allowed. And I was told this a whole year later!

That alone should have given me clemency, I thought. That’s not a light mistake, because that effected my financial aid and how many classes I chose to take per semester, etc. My adviser took the matter to the graduation committee and pleaded on my behalf, but they told her that they never make exceptions. Nice. Now I’m having to rethink my entire next 3 semesters and facing the possibility of having to graduate in the summer to fall of 2016 rather than in the spring of 2016. Frustrating! Not only that, I may not have the financial aid I need for all of my remaining classes- it’s just so tight. I’m having to work all of this out with my Isuzu Rodeo starter dying half the time and my water heater bursting open and gushing through my son’s walls. It’s…challenging, to say the least. But, as always, quitting is not an option. That’s just not in my vocabulary- not when it comes to college, anyway.

So now, despite the fact that I’ve got 111 credit hours under my belt, I now have 36-39 more to go. My heart actually sank for a moment when I got the news, but I’ve been in survival mode for so long; I can’t afford to focus on any negativity. I applied for a Federal Perkins Loan so that I can take two summer II courses to get an early start on my last batch of classes. If not, I’m going to have to bulk up my fall and spring semesters to 5 courses each term. Fingers crossed that I get that loan!

If I’m able to take the two summer classes (starting in July), they will be:

Forensic Anthropology
Topics in Criminal Justice: Serial Killers

-both upper level courses. Yes, they actually have a serial killers course! I’m so there. Forensic Anthropology is the study and analyzation of human remains at crime scenes. These classes are right up my alley! I’m so ready to get back to work.

Seed pods- taken early this morning with the Carl Zeiss Jena Flektogon 35/2.4 vintage film lens
seedpodsAAG

Man Trouble

How a single girl like me (who doesn’t even have a Facebook- or a boyfriend) has man trouble is beyond me- but honey, I got ’em!

And I ain’t complaining. :)

Too much time alone isn’t good for the soul.

And on that note, today’s catch:
Is it just me, or is there an Indian’s face in those trees?

indianOddWorldmjwheatmjselfiemj

For a Special Friend ♥ ╬ ♥

You know who you are! :)

I hope you like your little butterfly. (Or, mad rabbit, according to Mandy Tator Tots.) Made today from things collected on the back deck.  I know it’s nothing compared to the masterpieces you create without even trying- forever making art with your fingers absentmindedly- but all things considered, I hope you like it just the same. xo
butterflyforHsoj

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