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Non-tipping Homophobes

Wow, I’m pretty disturbed by a news story I just read. A family (husband/wife-two kids) went out to eat and racked up a bill of $93.55. Their waitress, who was a lesbian and an x-marine, received a “non-tip” with the following note scribbled on her receipt: “I’m sorry but I cannot tip because I don’t agree with your lifestyle & how you live your life.” They had based their assessments on her short hair.


I can’t believe the sheer stupidity of some people out there! And to do that in front of their children. I feel really bad for the waitress. I think people use the whole gay thing sometimes as a springboard for their every day good old fashioned hatred. It’s just so wrong on every level. As a Christian, I’m highly offended at the family’s behaviour. My favourite waiter ever (at the Olive Garden) was gay- he’s no longer there- and to be honest, at first I was taken aback. I just didn’t expect it when he first spoke, but we had a good chat and I warmed to him quickly. He was a great waiter! Apart from that, he was a very likable guy- funny, and a college graduate. I tipped him well and requested him personally the next time my family and I were there. He was really on top of his game and I love people who are on the ball. It’s a shame that there are people out there who make it a sport to condemn gay people. On the other side of that coin, it’s not right to go on Facebook attacking the offender and rallying the troops. Hate is hate- and it’s all bad. 

And on that note, Johhny Weir, if you’re reading this, you’re still my hero. xo


13 responses

  1. The Cats Meow

    This makes me so mad. People work extremely hard in the food industry. I really don’t think anyone has the right to judge but we all do it. There’s definitely a special black hole for that family.

    November 16, 2013 at 2:17 am

    • You’re right- we all do it- we all assess/judge one another secretly- I don’t care who says they don’t- we do. But it’s so wrong to do what she did! I really just wish I could give the waitress a hug. 😦 My heart goes out to her.

      November 16, 2013 at 2:22 am

  2. I’m withholding judgement for the moment. In the first place, I really don’t see why a server not being tipped is a national news story, and in the second place, it wouldn’t be the first time that something like this was manufactured out of whole cloth.

    November 16, 2013 at 3:49 am

    • I don’t think it made the news because a server wasn’t tipped, but rather the server wasn’t tipped based on her sexual preference.

      November 16, 2013 at 3:58 am

      • Exactly. No one would have heard of this otherwise.

        November 16, 2013 at 6:02 am

  3. Yep, pretty sickening, isn’t it? We have a ways to go before we evolve. It’s a shame those children are being taught to hate like that.

    November 16, 2013 at 3:59 pm

    • I know. That’s the part that bothers me the most: the children are being taught that it’s “ok” to think that others are below them. That behavior will be passed on but let’s hope the children reject that. It was drilled into me as a child by my parents to not mock, scoff, ridicule, or judge others- ever. I’ve clung to that tightly. The most hypocritical part of the whole non-tipping thing is that they can eat the food given to them from the waitresses hands, but not leave her money. Huh?! This really just reveals that they’re cold, selfish people who aren’t capable of showing kindness to others. I really can’t stand people who don’t have it in them to give- dead men walking.

      November 16, 2013 at 4:36 pm

  4. I sometimes wonder if the hypocritical practices of people who espouse some spiritual belief are one reason why the world is trending secular?

    November 17, 2013 at 11:57 am

    • I don’t think so. Hypocrites have been around since the birth of the first human being. And, if we’re truthful, we can look in our hearts deeply and see that we’re all hypocrites- not always no, but at some point in life- yes. If we say we’re not (or have not been), then we’re liars. Hard words! But truth. In the heart of every person, lies murder, hatred, envy, scorn, and so on. We don’t like to think that we have those things in our hearts, but we do. That’s why we can imagine choking somebody who has done us dirty, right? We’ve all murdered somebody with our hateful mouths at some point or another. We’re born with those things in us. Self righteous people like to think they don’t have those ugly layers in them- like the non-tipping woman here. They think they’re perfect already, so they have no shame at all looking down on others. But when you see what you have in you, truly, you cannot condemn others because you know that the same things lie in you. So no, I don’t think a few bad examples of Christians (who are indeed hypocrites) cause the world to trend secular. The world will always trend secular because it is the world.

      November 17, 2013 at 3:22 pm

  5. Michael

    Hmmm. Couple weeks ago, it was proven that the family did not write those words on the receipt. Just a wild guess, but it appears that “an employee” at the restaurant wrote it in, and then called the news media to report a case of homophobia. To get people mad and sympathetic to homophobia appeared to be the goal. I also noticed that the hoax was not reported extensively in the media, as it never is. People tend to want to remain comfy with a lie. The hoax worked on this and thousands of other blogs. Not one response above, other than mine, a month later. Another win for propaganda.

    December 18, 2013 at 9:03 am

    • I don’t doubt at all that it was a hoax, but I don’t doubt that it wasn’t either. Being a research student (both academically and personally) I study practically everything. At the time I wrote this, i hadn’t yet been “discovered” to have been a hoax: It was still relatively fresh. I am curious though to know your sources. :0) References? Sources? Quotes? Sites? (Sure, I could look these up myself, but as the person making the claim that it was a hoax, that’s your job.)

      If it was indeed a hoax, I believe there are still plenty of cases that do go on with similar circumstances. Human behavior neither shocks or surprises me any more. My posting served its own purpose nonetheless- hoax or real- which is to say, hatred is the real epidemic here, not homophobia. And in the end, it’s wrong to think we (whoever we are) are above or better than John or Jane Doe, whoever they may be.

      December 18, 2013 at 12:40 pm

      • Michael Actually, the former waitress would do the extended research. So far she has not contacted the media regarding suing her former employer for lying. All eyes off of her. Her attention seeking days are finished. So yeah, it’s a hoax. As for your post, you may want to explain your title contradiction. You stated this issue is supposed to be about hating, not homophobia propaganda. Yet, there’s your title, for all the internet to read. Maybe it should be changed, or this post deleted. The vast majority of heteros are neither haters nor homophobes. Being against gay marriage does not make one a hater or homophobe either. So why are you buying into the propaganda with such a title, when you are clearly contradicting yourself? Why incite yourself and others with your own brand of hate? Like the propagandists, you really ought to take a close look at what you are unjustifiably inciting – the same thing you are condemning.

        December 18, 2013 at 1:05 pm

      • I have no need to change my title and have not contradicted myself at all. My views are very strong and real. My title is called “Nontipping homophobes” because a woman made a judgement call against somebody with short hair whom she didn’t know.

        As I’ve stated Michael, my post is about “Non-tipping homophobes” and the article’s correlation. Is the article a hoax? No. The article is real. Are what the article states facts? Who is to say? Are you saying the waitress is making it up just because she won’t respond? You don’t know that.

        I back up everything I say. If it’s your intention to go around and around with me like a gnarly blackbird, pecking at my post, perhaps your time would be better used educating yourself on personal interests.

        I don’t “change my posts” or my titles. If something has offended you, perhaps you should question why, or peer deeply into your character. Do not be so easily offended; my post wasn’t directed at you.

        I cannot stop you from making my “Non-Tipping Homophobes” post about yourself, however. I don’t control others. Neither do you.

        December 18, 2013 at 1:20 pm


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