photographer. artist. author. singer. songwriter. musician. teacher. student. humanitarian. visionary. addiction counselor. therapist.

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Midterms

I’m starting to feel the stress of midterms; two if which are due by Monday. I made my guys (Josh and Brian) a delicious supper of oven-roasted turkey, polenta squares, fresh collard greens, shells-n-cheddar, over-sized baked yams, green onions w/sliced grape tomatoes + lemon ginger tea for Josh and Honey Vanilla Chamomile for Brian- along with freshly made cinnamon rolls. I love my guys! I hear them laughing as they play Gary’s Mod. in the living room: I’m very happy. 🙂

I have a massive Excel assignment due in my Research Methods class (where we’ll be working with Analyses of Sample Demographics) which I was supposed to already have started on, another research topic proposal due in my Cross-Cultural Communications class, and worst of all, I’m supposed to take my midterm in Everyday Psychology- but get this: it’s 132 multiple choice questions + short essay and we only have 1 hour and 15 minutes- for a 132 question exam! That’s sheer insanity. I don’t think my professor has any idea what he’s asking. There’s just no way to accomplish a 132 question psychology exam in 75 minutes. It’s not even a realistic expectation. I’ve written him and asked him to change the allotted time to at least two hours. At this point, I still have a 100% (A) in the class, but after an exam like that, I could drop a whole letter grade. Short essay too? That’s insane!

Still, I’m in good spirits and am feeling content and relaxed. I’m still holding on to my strong A’s in 3 of my classes and am trying hard to recover my grade in Ethics. I’m fighting to keep my B; it’s a really difficult course. It’s my first semester at my new university and I’m really fighting hard to make the Dean’s List! I won’t know for a bit yet, but I’ve been on the Dean’s List at both my other schools (Ivy Tech and Vincennes University) and although this school is much harder, I’m putting my best foot forward and am working really hard this semester.

I miss the really deep, introspective writing that I’m used to; I just don’t have time to do that these days! My days are flying by and already, we’re getting ready to kiss this year goodbye. Time to fold the clothes and watch Intervention.

Flowers in Kentucky/Bluegrass state- Carl Zeiss Jena Flektogon 35/2.8(film)/natural lighting/all manual

FlowersMJ

Rainy Day Brunch and Comfy Socks

The rain is falling down in soft patterns that make me happy. It was a raging torrent earlier but has now fallen back to gentle solace. The house is clean so I’ve decided to stay in bed and knock back my Ethics assignment, which is due by midnight. Looks like a great time waiting to happen! (Note the sarcasm.) Take, for example:

  1. In Everyday Morality, Martin considers Ruth Benedict as representing the philosophical view of ethical conventionalism (pp. 53-54).  What does she say in the excerpt from her Anthropology and the Abnormal (in Resources) that would support ethical conventionalism?
  2. Although not included in the excerpt, Benedict ends her paper with these words:  “It is as it is in ethics:  all our local conventions of moral behavior and of immoral are without absolute validity, and yet it is quite possible that a modicum of what is considered right and what wrong could be disentangled that is shared by the hole human race” (quoted in Rosenstand, p. 147).  Does this statement contradict what she said in the excerpt from Anthropology and the Abnormal that you read?  Why or why not?  Does this statement contradict the perspective of ethical conventionalism?  Why or why not?
  3. According to the excerpts you have read, what do The Poisonwood Bible and Possessing the Secret of Joy have in common?  What are their major differences?  Which of these two approaches to diversity and relativism do you find more compelling?  Explain.
  4. What would each of the various perspectives Martin discusses in chapter 4 (ethical conventionalism, ethical pluralism, two versions of conceptual relativism, two definitions of multiculturalism) say about female genital mutilation?   In your view, would female genital mutilation be morally right (permissible or obligatory) or morally wrong (impermissible)?  Why or why not?

Ethical conventionalism, perspectivism, universalism, ethical pluralism, etc. 

Blah.

My TMJ pain is making me crazy: it’s unrelenting! It feels like somebody’s pulling my jaw (continuously) out if its socket. Medicaid will not cover TMJ because they think that surgical procedures for chronic TMJ (such as I have) are not “necessary”. Don’t you love it? So now I’m in constant pain and have one of two choices: do nothing and suffer, or double up on my (homeopathic, all natural) pain meds. I really don’t want to do that but damn if I’m going to sit here and try to get work done with little, evil elves digging out my jaw meat with pitchforks. (Double up on pain meds it is.)

I have an exceptional brunch of fried ham, brown eggs, English muffin w/cream cheese & cherry preserves + lemon ginger tea.

brunchMJ

And my comfy socks.

comfysoxMJ
Thanks again to my son’s little lady- Many tator tots– who is a total sweetheart! 🙂

Gaming Saturday!

It’s a cold, rainy day, and I’m tucked into my bed in my jammies- pile of schoolbooks semi-stacked in a sloppy pile beside me. I awoke with a feeling of accomplishments over the past week: caught up on schoolwork (early), cleaned the house meticulously, spent some quality time with my mother and took care of my bad tooth. Saturdays usually mean writing another report with a gazillion citations + reading chapters on bivariate coordinates and chipping away at research topic proposals (I’m juggling two at the moment) and catching up on work that’s been put off until the last minute.

But this week, I made some personal habit changes and have begun to do my work early so that I can scale back on stress.

Rule # 1: Get your work done early!

And so I’ve followed this rule adherently. Alas, all of this responsibility has made me want to be wild and willy, so Josh and I have renamed this day Gaming Saturday! There will be no schoolwork (for me) or housework (for either). I’ve made a fresh pot of lemon ginger tea and we’ll stay in bed and game all day: he on his desktop and me on my laptop.

I’m downloading The Raven- Legacy of a Master Thief [move up queue- check! Bandwidth allocation set to high- check! Go!] and he’ll be playing Gary’s Mod. no doubt, but this is what we’ll be doing ’til 1 or 2 am or so: it’s how we blow off steam. Is there any better way?

Red River Gorge (Slade, Kentucky)- Carl Zeiss Jena Flektogon- 35/2.8/natural lighting/manual
VacayPixMJ
RedRiverGorgeMJ

Snapshot

Busy.
Busy.
Busy.

Here’s a snapshot of my day:

  • Josh wakes me up with sweet, warm, coffee kisses, “Byeeee…”
  • Pop out of bed, make some strong, black Gevalia.. Take acidophilus, fish oil, milk thistle (best liver cleanser on the planet), two papaya enzymes (to aid degestion) + the standard two Ibuprofin gel caps.
  • Have some breakfast: vanilla Greek yogurt and some Ruby Red grapefruit juice
  • Hop in shower
  • Get ready for dentist appointment
  • Dentist- full pano x-ray + cavity drilled and filled (raw nerves exposed- extremely painful)- xray results- TMJ “condo” area (cheek & jawbone joint on right side) is “not looking good”- is extremely swollen and may have bone mutation/deformation from chronic TMJ- may need surgery- TMJ specialist referral
  • Straight to Mom’s house- pick up grocery list/my treat- go shopping for both my Mom & I- ($300)
  • Drop off groceries/go home- Josh is home early- he helps put away groceries
  • Laundry/cleaning/dishes, etc.
  • Two more Ibuprofin gel caps because mouth hurts like a &^%$# and novacaine has worn off completely
  • Make dinner for Josh & i: steak, polenta, fresh collard greens, fresh portabella mushrooms, green onions, fingerling “smushed potatoes” w/sour cream/garlic & scallions
  • Put away laundry/wash another load
  • Dishes (again)
  • Give dog (Chance) a bath
  • Take another shower
  • Make hot Epson salt foot soak for Josh
  • Take dog for walk
  • Come home- finish up remaining dishes
  • Make Celestial Seasonings Tension Tamer tea for Josh and I (w/honey- good stuff!)
  • Put clothes into dryer
  • Brush teeth & fall into bed early with stack of schoolbooks at 10:36 p.m.

Cringeworthy!

SnapshotMJ
Carl Zeiss Jena Flektogon 35/2.8 film lens + Canon Rebel XSI

Awesome Sale- Awful Vacation

I came back from my vacation with a notice that I made a sale: that’s always nice! Somebody bought a framed print of:

 The Longest Dream

flat,800x800,070,f.u3 It’s a nice feeling that somebody would pay almost $200 for one of my prints. So, to whoever the mystery buyer is, thank you deeply! That made my day.

Unfortunately, our vacation was like a bad SNL skit. It really was the vacation from hell. I blame both of us being overworked-like two highly pressurized pots that have been on the stove for far too long. The best part was sleeping in the car on the first night. We read books on our Androids on an air mattress- priceless! But then we got semi-lost the next day and all hell broke loose. I can’t go into detail, because I don’t want to paint anybody black. There was yelling and cussing and that’s all before we even got to the cabin!

The location was absolutely stunning. But then it all went downhill very quickly, starting with the two large dogs (the size of small horses) which jumped all over us as soon as we got out of the car. The owner, Fred (who took a liking to hanging over his front porch), failed to mention that he and his wife actually lived on the premises too. We weren’t going to be alone as the website indicated; their cabin was only feet away from ours. Strike one.

And then there was the whole no-WiFi thing. The website said there was Wifi- nope! Fred told us that the teens who had stayed there prior to our arriving had used it all up. (Fred conveniently neglected to tell us that part on the phone while booking with him just days before.) Strike two. But the worst part of all was those damn acorns. Not the dry kind that bounces off the roof quietly- no no- these were the heavy, green kind that hit the tin roof with an ear-shattering CRACK. CRACK. CRACK. Every 25-45 seconds- just like clock work, without fail. Strike three.

Kiss your sanity (and any hope of a good night sleep goodbye). I couldn’t go out on my front porch without seeing Fred on his. The entire time, Fred let his dogs roam free, up onto our deck when we were grilling ribs- it didn’t matter. Between the dogs, the lack of internet, and the blasted acorns, I really couldn’t wait to get back home. I did manage to get 10 gigs of beautiful shots. I was only able to edit a few, as it’s back to the grind! Josh is working 12 hours days and I’m back to my 5-7 page research papers. It’s intense, but at least it’s predictable!

Post trip- still sane!

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   Josh on the boat
Josh on boatMJ

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Reflections of trees

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Josh, rocking out on the suspension bridge at Red River Gorge
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Pics taken with Carl Zeiss Jena Flektogon 35/3.5 film lens + Canon Rebel XSI/natural lighting/manual

One Day to Go

Cross Cultural Communications test- A
Research Methods for Experimental Psychology test- A

Apart from my Ethics class (which I hate), I’m maintaining all A’s in my classes. I’m used to my little 100 and 200 level classes. These 300+ level classes are kicking my butt! Really though, it’s nothing compared to what I’ll be doing when I’m working on my Master’s/Clinical Psychology.

My favourite class so far is definitely “Research Methods”. Naturally, there’re a lot of dependent and independent variables and such, but it’s not as heavy on perspectives as I thought it would be. Really, much of it deals with the precision of APA so I’m grateful that I have a good professor who cares about her work and her students. It’s a tough course! I love it though. Although I was only supposed to get a 50% refund for dropping my Statistics course (because it was during the 3rd week), I filed an appeal with the school and attached 10 emails to back up my claims that my professor was grossly under-prepared to teach the course. I have always fought for what I believe in, especially where school is concerned. My appeal was granted, and despite the fact that it was already the 3rd week, I was granted a full refund- 100%. Triumph!

All of my school work is done for the week and I’m super excited: Josh and I are heading to the hills of Kentucky tomorrow! We still need to pack, but we’re both acting positively giddy and can’t wait to leave. We’re wanting to get out of here so bad, we’re thinking about leaving a day early and sleeping on an air mattress in the back of the Rodeo. For me, there’s something romantic about camping out in the truck and listening to the sounds of crickets in the middle of nowhere. Then on the 2nd and 3rd nights we’ll be at the cabin. I can’t believe it’s been a year since our last vacation together! This is long overdue.

I plan on taking all 3 of my film lenses: the Super Tak 135/3.5, Helios 44-2, and my Carl Zeiss Jena Flektogon 35/2.8. I’m loving my Zeiss at the moment. It has a great film quality texture to it that I just don’t get with digital lenses and the exposure has a bit of a natural glow to it. I took a solitary walk on my birthday the other day at a place that Josh and I named Bullfrog Creek. Here are some sample pics from my walk (the train bridge was high up in the air- about 11 stories up- my dog was terrified):

Carl Zeiss Jena Flektogon 35/2.8 film lens + digital camera/Canon Rebel XSI

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4

5

6

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It’s 2:21 a.m. and Josh just left to go get chocolate truffles, Jolly Ranchers and Pringles for me (after working a 14 hour day). What a man! I’m wiped out. Time to call it a day…

Did he Really Just Say That?

I was watching a “controversial sermon” (as the interwebs is calling it) made by the wife of Joel Osteen, Victoria Osteen, on serving God and self. I don’t think this is controversial at all. People are going bananas because Victoria Osteen was preaching and said that when we serve God, we’re really “doing what makes us happy” rather than God. She was endorsing this particular method of serving God and telling the congregation to do just that, because when we make ourselves happy, we make God happy. This shouldn’t be taken out of context! For example, if a person is a kleptomaniac, it’s not going to make God happy if they steal, if stealing makes that person happy, etc.

However, I do think Victoria Osteen is on to something in that when we are playing into our altruistic ways and doing good for others, we are in fact “serving ourselves” in our deeds too. She was merely highlighting this aspect of “self” which can be seen throughout various psychological perspectives, as I’ve learned through my studies. I can’t say I’m in 100% agreement with her, but I can’t dispute her claim altogether either.

But this isn’t the jaw-dropping part. Steve Camp, a pastor and former chart-topper in the Christian music world, said in a Huffington Post clip (at 2:55- 3:28), “Victoria seems like a sweet person but an uninformed person. She can’t be a pastor of a church- there’s no place in the Scripture for a woman to be a co- pastor of anything, and…she needs to be discipled. She seems immature yet very sincere in what she’s claiming.”  (http://live.huffingtonpost.com/r/highlight/christians-react-to-victoria-osteens-controversial-sermon/540e11b5fe3444535b0001dc?cn=tbla)

Dude! What?

I cannot believe in 2014 that such ignorance is still thriving. How in the world can a person think that God is limited and that He cannot move His Spirit upon a woman if He so chooses? This level of ignorance is shocking. I could pop off a fat handful of  Scriptures right now- from memory alone- that proves that God can and indeed does encourage women to preach- and not only encourages them but ordains them.

The very fact that God says that we (both male and female) are created in His image tells a person that God is not just male, but female too.

So God created man in His own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them. (Gen. 1:27)

Here’s something else to consider: There’s a place in the book of Numbers where God sends a prophet, Balaam, to go and speak to the people in a town. The prophet decided to not go and changes his direction. When the donkey he was riding on actually corrected the prophet’s misdirection, the prophet smote the ass, hurting it. This happened three times, causing the donkey to actually speak out- as in- using actual words so that the prophet understood it:

“And the LORD opened the mouth of the ass and she said unto Balaam, ‘What have I done unto thee, that thou hast smitten me these three times?”‘ (Num. 22:28)

What does this Scripture tell us?

It tells us that if God can open a donkey’s mouth and cause it to speak, don’t think He can’t open a woman’s mouth and cause her to preach.

And here’s one for the road, which eradicates sexist claims, such as what Mr. Camp offered:

There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither bond nor free, there is neither male nor female: for ye are all one in Christ Jesus. (Gal. 3:28)

And here’s another important Scripture to chew on. Deborah, who was a prophetess, judge, and warrior–mentioned in the book of Judges–was chosen to lead Israel out of the hands of their oppressors. The people had prayed for a leader, and they were given Deborah- a woman.

People came and sought advice from her under a palm tree, where she used to sit:

And she dwelt under the palm tree of Deborah between Ramah and Bethel in mount Ephraim: and the children of Israel came up to her for judgment. (Judges 4:5)

Barak, a warrior, sought advice from her about going into battle. in so many words, she told him that sure, she would go with him (being a warrior too), but that there would be no glory in it for him and that the Lord would deliver their enemy into the hands of a woman:

“And she said, I will surely go with thee: notwithstanding the journey that thou takest shall not be for thine honour; for the Lord shall sell Sisera into the hand of a woman. And Deborah arose, and went with Barak to Kedesh.” (Judges 4:9)

Sexist men, who think a woman must “remain silent in the church”- please- educate yourselves in the Bible before opening your mouths, calling women “immature” and saying that they have no place to preach. Be a disciple yourself and stop limiting God’s strength and power. Does Jesus not say that all things are possible with God?

“But Jesus beheld them, and said unto them, ‘With men’ this is impossible but with God, all things are possible.” (Matthew 19:26)

If you are truly a “believer”, then believe.

My Head is a Wreck Again

It’s been a while since I’ve battled one of these migraines: I’ve grown a little too comfortable without them. Life has been a dizzying whir of cramming chapters again, quizzes, and posting a ton of forum posts per class. Some professors are asking for 6 posts in a week. (That’s an unusually large amount for one week.) I ended up dropping my Statistics class because…well…my professor was less than competent. On the first week of class, he was still vacationing in the wilderness of remote Alberta. By the end of the week, we still didn’t have a syllabus or our course ID number for the MyStatLab. (Um, what am I paying for again? Can I get a competent teacher up in this mug?)

Still, I managed to get the 100+ Statistic problems finished that he asked for- all without extending our due dates up a week. Unfortunately, that much math ended up causing me to be late in another class, and although I was only late for one forum discussion board, my professor- my communications professor– cited me as a “risk”- all because I was late for ONE FORUM POSTING. Let’s keep in mind that I emailed her 3 times and she never responded. Communications my ass.

But that’s not the bad part. The bad part is that she herself had a family tragedy and forgot to post week 3’s assignment. For 3 days. But I’m a “risk”. (Hello? Is there a button I can push to notify somebody of my professor being a risk?) If you can’t walk the walk- don’t talk the talk!

I have a heap of assignments due still by Sunday but after 6+ hours of straight schoolwork- I’m toast. Normally, that would just be my starting point, but 6 hours with a brooding semi-migraine is quite an accomplishment. Josh has gone to retrieve the remedy. I won’t say what the remedy is, but if you know me well enough, you know what that remedy is. (It’s not pot and I sort of wish it was.) Alas, I hate pot.

So tonight, I’ll lounge in bed with my laptop watching Project Free TV, nursing my head, and I hope I’m eating bad crap and feeling really good about it.

Grrrr…

grrr

Painting with Light

Pics taken manually with the Super Tak film lens + Digital Rebel XSI. Natural sunlight- some SOOTC/straight out of the camera/Spring Mill Park- Mitchell, Indiana 9/8/14 (“Painting with Light” my interpretation– start out with total blackness. Bring in the light subtly via ISO/sh. sp./ & ap.) 

TreesMJ

SOOTC/straight out of the camera- cropped only

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Another SOOTC/cropped only
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Unhappy Customer

It’s 3:10 a.m. and I’ve just finished up 7 hours of Statistics. Why 7 hours you might ask? Because my professor was unable to get our class up and running for the whole first week (and our corresponding online homework site) and it set us back a week. Rather than move our schedule up by a week, he’s left the due date for 100+ 3 and 4 part math problems (some taking a 10 minute completion for one problem) at Sept. 6th at midnight. I was only able to access the site 3 days ago, so this left me trying to complete a GAZILLION freaking problems today. I actually managed this insane task- barely. (My only other option was to drop the course and that ain’t happening.) 

Rather than sleep, I’m going to jump right into my assignments in my other classes, because:

a.) They’re due today by midnight, and

b.) Who needs sleep anyway?!

The good thing about this schedule is that you’re both too busy and distracted to be depressed. 

Josh hasn’t had a day off in more than a month: We see each other in passing these days. We still managed to sneak in a dinner date last night at the river where we dined on Vietnamese just before midnight. 

I need a freaking vacation already…

The  Big Sleep

This and That

I’m honestly too tired to think of a clever title. I’m beginning to think I was mad to attempt 5 classes this semester! Alas, the boat has left the shore so onward I go. Here’s what my schedule’s looking like for the next few days:

Cross-cultural Communications– Read chap. 1 & do DB/Discussion Board-respond to 2 classmate’s posts/take exam

Research Methods of Experimental Psychology– Complete CITI training/DB postings/Read chap. 4- take Ethics exam

Ethics– “Think & Write” assignment/Read chap. 1/Read Plato’s Republic (various chapters), Lord of the Rings commentary and chapter excerpts & discussion along with The Rings of Tolkien & Plato, DB/Discussion Board on Chap. 1/Respond to 3 classmate’s threads

Everyday Psychology– Read chap. 1/Journal entry/Do both DBs and take exam

Statistical Techniques for Health Professionals– do 90 more Stat problems on descriptive and inferential Statistics + 2 quizzes and 1 test

That about wraps it up for week two!

My day began with me taking my Mom to her doctor’s appointment at 9:00 a.m. Her medication levels were off and she was toxic. Thankfully we caught it in time. Afterwards, my day was a flurry of activity but I managed to squeeze in a mile walk at the park with the dog- back to flurried activity- supper (Mom and brother fed- check!) 5 hours of schoolwork- milkshakes at Steak ‘n Shake with the fam-back outside for another late night walk with the dog. I’m pretty sure my punctuation is blown all to hell but I’m too tired to check. 

So, at almost 2:00 a.m., I’m off to slap some Proactive on my face and brush my teeth- slam an Ambien and drift off into blissful nothingness. I’ll be back when I come up for air!

Taken today at the park- Helios 44-2/manual exposure

form

punch

Louisville

Downtown Jeffersonville/Louisville, KY in the background

Old Leaves- New Day

leaves Canon XSI + m42 (to EOS) EF adapter + Helios 44-2/manual/natural sunlight/ ISO 100/ f/2
The marriage of digital camera + old (Helios) film lens imported from the Ukraine
Taken today

Let the Good Times Roll

Five years ago, my sister gave me her Honda, thinking it wouldn’t last much longer. I had been praying that very day for a miracle, asking God to help me with a car. That evening, she came over and told me that she wanted to give me her car. The timing couldn’t have been more perfect! So, for five years I’ve been driving it. The water pump crashed and died last year, but all year, I’ve been driving it- overheating every two miles. Talk about trying your patience! It can be super stressful when you feel like you’re in a death trap. 

Thankfully, my Frank O’Bannon award came in a few days ago: $1,800 that doesn’t need repayed. I’m buying a new laptop for school ($70 from Craig’s List- hey, it’s “new” to me!), a new camera (Canon t3i 18 MP body only for $255- brand new- a steal) and a new copy of the Helios 44-2 film lens- imported from the USSR. And, I bought this!

1997 Isuzu Rodeo

my car

It sells for around $3,000-$5,000 used, but I was able to trade in my old car and knock a few hundred down. I gave the car lot guy $1,000 cash and drove it off the lot- I’m ecstatic. It drives smoother than butter and it’s a 5 speed, which I love.

Essentially, I still have 5 days left before the start of my semester, but I like to get an early start, so I’ll be ordering all of my books in the next hour and then loading up my laptop tomorrow: 5 neat folders- each class loaded with its respective syllabus, assignments, contact info & email instructions, and all of the other necessary bits. (You can never be too prepared.) 

My son, “Bob-Brian”, is staying over with his little lady, Mandy Tator Tots, and I’m in the best mood I’ve been in ages. 

Two-headed Monster- taken tonight in parking garage- crappy cell phone pic- Josh & I

us

I had just enough money left over to send a few hundred to my daughter and give $300 to my little brother to help him out.  I think it’s safe to say it’s a very good time in our lives. Five days of freedom left! 

Until we meet again. x

A Little Spark

“You’re only given a little spark of madness. You mustn’t lose it.” –Robin Wlliams

WarholMOMAMuseum goers at the Warhol exhibit- 2010/Museum of Modern Art(MOMA)/New York City, New York/Canon Rebel XSI-Sigma 17-70

Why Good People Suffer

I’ve recently read a story about a beloved blogger (Rara AKA Rarasaur) who has been the victim of a hate crime. I can’t go completely into her story because I don’t have enough information, but she was accused of embezzling $500,000 from her former employers.

She left their employment to start her own business along with a healthy client list. My suspicion is that her former bosses were afraid that she would be competition in some manner, so they assassinated her character by accusing her of embezzlement, and went a step further by contacting her entire client list, damaging her reputation and corrupting any potential hope of generating clientele.

She and her husband sold all that they had to obtain an lawyer, and she ultimately lost her business. They moved into a tiny hotel and lived on $5 pizzas- hardly the stuff of half a million dollars! For the next few years, Rara fought for her life. In the end, it was useless. Rara was sentenced to 3 years in prison: 18 months for good behavior. (Most prisoners only serve 50% of their sentences if they become model prisoners.) There was never an official investigation into the (alleged) missing half a million dollars. It was all very hush-hush, yet they still managed to ship the case over to the D.A. and she was charged.

I don’t know Rara personally and have only ever left one comment on her blog, but her pictures of herself reflect a woman who radiates love. She’s been known to raise boatloads of money for other people and is an activist in the blogging community, as well as a poetess and huge supporter of organizations she believes in.

Everything in me says that she is innocent. The reason this story is so close to my heart is because I too was falsely accused of something I didn’t do many years ago. My entire family was ripped apart and we were all punished relentlessly, year after year. I wasn’t allowed to speak in court, ever, and so after years of being thrown about in a vicious and abrasive system, I fired my attorney just to be able to speak out in court, finally. I slammed my hands down on the table and demanded that my kids return home. They had taken everything else from me, but I wasn’t going to let them take my voice.

It was the right thing to do. The case took a necessary turn and I was spared going to prison on trumped up false charges. The case drug on for 13 years or so. I was pulled apart at the seams and tested beyond anything I’ve ever experienced. I went through absolute hell but I never gave up. Year after year, the battering continued, but I never gave up. I learned just how weak I was in the face of such a crushing device as our government- but I also learned how strong I was.

So many innocent people are sentenced to prison every day. It’s a horrific circle of injustice: the accusers, lawyers, and everybody involved knows that poor people cannot defend themselves properly, therefore, they offer a plea agreement (which is seldom in favour of the defendant) and most times, the defendant ends up taking the prison sentence because they’re out of resources and too exhausted to continue fighting.

I have my own theory as to why evil things happen to good people. I deal with many (many) people on a daily basis who have suffered abuse, trauma, etc. and who carry deep scars and even deeper resentment. I’ve spoken (typed) with literally thousands of people over the past decade, sharing my own personal story of tragedy and triumph. Why do horrible things happen to people like us, who just want to do good in this world and live our lives?

Why?

And every time, I think of Joseph (from the Bible). His is a true story. Joseph’s siblings hated him so much because his parent favoured him over them. Jospeh had had dreams of his brothers bowing down to him: it infuriated them! Josheph’s father, Jacob, had given Joseph as special coat made from various colours. When his brothers saw it, their envy was so intense that they wanted to kill him. So one day, they thought of a scheme that involved killing their brother, and smearing animal’s blood on his precious coat. They would take the bloody coat to their father and tell him that Joseph had been murdered by an animal, and that’s just what they did. They wanted to defile the very thing that represented their Dad’s love for Joseph.

So, they threw Joseph into a deep pit, ripping his coat from him. They devised ways that they might kill him. Only one of his brothers, Reuben, loved him. He stood up for Joseph and suggested that they sell him instead and get some money. He appealed to their greed to save his brother’s life, and it worked.

Joseph was sold to some travelers on their way to Egypt. He landed in a rich man’s house named Potiphar. Potiphar’s wife desired Joseph and tried to seduce him on a number of occasions, but Joseph was all about doing the right thing. He was thrown into prison for telling the truth. He had done nothing wrong.

While in prison, Joseph suffered much hunger and beatings; diseases and all sorts of evil things. All the while, God had been preparing Joseph’s heart for great things! But look what he had to go through to get them.

Fast forward many years. Joseph had grown into a man and had been incarcerated for many years in dark, diseased dungeons. One day, the king of the land had troubling dreams and only Joseph could interpret them. He told the king that there would be a great famine in Egypt- the king himself had dreamed about it!

In the end, Joseph was made chief in command (second only to the king) and saved all of Egypt, and ultimately his very brothers who tried to kill him. And in the end, they indeed did have to bow down to their brother, just as his dream had predicted.

When you observe Joseph’s life in bits and pieces, it seems so unfair that he had to suffer the way he did. But God just wanted to “give him a new coat”. The bigger picture is a beautiful one.

Joseph’s story is not so different than my own.

In all that happened to me, God simply wanted to give me a new coat. 🙂 That coat is very expensive. It looks like old goat skin that is weathered and worn, shredded here and there and barely held together after years of being ripped apart, but it’s laced with diamonds- the most durable stuff in the world.

The most important thing to remember, when you’re in the fire and feel as if you’re going to be burned to a crisp- is that the heat is God’s love. It hurts like hell, sure it does, and it feels like hell. But His intention is not to kill you. It’s in that fire that all of the impurities are burned away, and in the end, you’ll come out shinier than gold and you’ll have the goods that it takes to help other people who are still in the fire.

So Rara, if you ever read this some day, I have no doubt that you’re going to come through this thing a winner. Think about all of the lives you will touch that can only be reached by becoming the sacrifice, as you have done.

There’s a great need for genuine love in prison. I have no doubt that you’ll touch many lives. God needed to send the right woman for the job, and I believe He did.

Shine on, Rara. xo

ForRara

Fall Schedule

SummerFALLHelios film lens 44-2/Canon Rebel f/8/manual- taken on back deck- 8.4.14

I’ve officially made the switch from Vincennes University over to Indiana University East. My admissions counselour, Cherie, helped me register for my classes, which are:

1) Research Methods for Experimental Psychology
2) Cross Cultural Communications
3) Statistical Techniques (post-pre Calculus math course)
4) Everyday Psychology
5) Ethics

That’s a healthy 15 credit hour schedule- no small potatoes. (The most I’ve ever taken in one semester were 21 credit hours- 6 classes- and apart from one class, received 5 A’s, so I think I can swing this.)

As much as I’d love to stay at VU and explore CSI/Forensics and as much as I’d love to entertain the possibility of a future in DNA & Serology, my calling is clearly in the area of working with people on the street at the street level. Sure, a cushy office (with AC in the summer) would be great and everything- degrees hanging on the wall- but I’m driven by my desire to work with people who are drug addicts, homeless, troubled, hopeless- society’s throwaways, and those who suffer from a myriad of emotional/psychological disorders. That much I know.

A few years ago, I dropped out of school entirely, due to severe migraines that plagued me weekly. My Pastor encouraged me to return to school- if at all possible- which I was miraculously able to do. At the time, I owed the school more than $1,000, due to having to drop out. In short, I was screwed. But I was so encouraged by her letter, I called the school and asked if anything could be done to help me. I faxed in a few medical documents, proving that I’d had physical complications and the school wiped out the entire debt. (This is why I say that my return was nothing short of a miracle. This just doesn’t happen in the academic world!) She (my Pastor) suggested that I get out of Business Administration and explore other areas that would better utilize my talents, such as working with others. Had it not been for her urging, I would have never returned, so that’s always in the back of my mind. I push on for others and not just myself.

School begins in approximately 3 weeks and I couldn’t be more excited! I’m hoping to take a year off to work on my music, but I’m not sure if that will be before or after I receive my bachelor’s in Psychology.

In the meantime, I’m going to keep myself occupied by surprising my Mom’s friend with a photo book that I’m calling “Whispers from the Garden”. Her friend’s husband passed away several years ago and they shared an amazing garden behind their house. I shot some pics there last winter and will be compiling the book from my collection of pics taken of their winter garden.

Supper calls! Until next time.

Birdhouse from the garden

Birdhouse

“This is Dad, Calling from Heaven.”

 

Dadjpg

I had a strange dream the other night. My Dad called me on the phone. It sounded distant, understandably so- he passed on to Heaven a number of years ago.

“Birg,” he said. “This is Dad…calling from Heaven.”

I was shocked when I awoke. I thought it was utterly cool that he would call me from the Great Divide. 🙂 The Bible makes mention of a banister of Witnesses leaning over Heaven. God gives these particular Saints permission to cross over from time to time to witness to us that are still here. My Dad told me that himself, many years ago.

“Come on! You can make it!” They say, to encourage us.

I dream of my Dad all of the time. He comes to me many times per year, ministering to me, sharing Scriptures and such- we still have a great time, and, truth be told, you can call them “dreams”, but they’re more than that.

I had such a dream a few months ago. Me and my (extended) family were all standing on a high mountain. All of us. My Dad was at the very top and he was turned around, looking back over his shoulder. He looked like a lumberjack and was about 25 years younger. He wore a big smile on his face and was waving his hand to follow him. I knew what the dream meant, for he taught me to interpret dreams many years ago.

It was Christmas day when they took my Dad off of life support. The doctors wanted to see if he would make it through for the next few days without it. Naturally, everybody was gathered together for Christmas festivities, but I stayed at the hospital all day with him. I couldn’t bear for him to be alone on that day. We had a great time, given the circumstances. I’d already been told that he’d been muttering things incoherently because of the medication and such. But no such thing happened on that day.

Instead, he shared two Scriptures with me from the KJV and was as clear as a bell doing so. One of those verses was Titus 1:2-

Paul, a servant of God, and an apostle of Jesus Christ, according to the faith of God’s elect, and the acknowledging of the truth which is after Godliness;

In hope of eternal life, which God, THAT CANNOT LIE, promised before the world began;

And he went on to share with me the comfort in knowing that God cannot lie, does not lie, and will not lie. He took great comfort in the fact that God keeps all of His promises and will absolutely save us. He could accept that he felt like “the chief of sinners” much of the time, but God would ultimately keep His word and deliver him. And so it was.

I didn’t know how much time I had left with him that day. We were best friends at the end, and had been for years. We’d been through so much hell together! But such GREAT forgiveness. And, the Word does say that with much forgiveness is much love. Those who forgive the most, love the most: he surely taught me that.

I hugged him then, and fell on his neck and told him that it was a total privilege to be his daughter on this side of Heaven.

“I’ll see you up there, Dad. Save me a seat.”

And there was nothing more to say.

I thought that there would be a big gap after he died. But really, we’re still very close and “death” only stands as a doorway that he crossed through into LIFE. Even so, I’m glad he takes time out of his busy schedule “up there” to still give me a call. :0)

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Water, Water, Everywhere

Josh, taking a pic of me at the Louisville water park. Helios film lens 44-2JoshWaterparkcell

“Do you know how beautiful you are?” I ask him.
Joshwaterpark

“I feel beautiful,” he says.

Jpaterpark

Red Yeti Brewing Company: The Review

RYLogomj

256 Spring Street/Jeffersonville, Indiana/47130

Josh told me about a new place in town called the Red Yeti Brewing Company. What’s this? A real craft brewing company with farm to fork food? In Jeffersonville, Indiana? I had to know more so we popped in today for a quick bite and a cold stout.

First, a bit of history. Our region is as old as the hills and seldom is there a new shop (or store) open that offers farm to fresh anything. Sauces come in large cans and you’re lucky to get fresh homemade pasta anywhere. Our city is dusty, old, historic, and not much happens in the way of culinary surprises.

So it was a nice fresh surprise upon first arriving: a small quaint crowd gathered ’round the bar, and the smell of fresh food was immediate. We were greeted by our server, Ashley, who was super friendly (but not overbearing) and besides serving us, she filled us in on the local food scene- what came from where- and also obliged to tell us what our food was made of.

Ashley

Ashley

I’d like an Ashley in every restaurant. I was dying to know what was in our smoked brisket, besides their homemade BBQ sauce (yes, homemade), smoked cheeseand bacon jam. There was a distinct sweetness there that I couldn’t quite pick out.

BrisketMJ

“Blueberries,” Ashley revealed. “We don’t have a freezer or a microwave. All of our food is market fresh from the local region.”

Ashley, we love you. (Don’t worry Jack. We love you too!)

Our home cut fries were served with a fresh covering of grated parmesan with a side of garlic ranch aioli. The food was absolutely fantastic and so very fresh. Although they spoke of making their own brew soon, for now, they’re importing a variety of exotic sounding (and tasting) beers. Take for instance, the Brooklyn Chocolate Stout:

BrookylynChocStoutMJ

It’s absolutely out of this world with notes of deep chocolate. It’s richer, deeper, and full of way more flavor than a traditional stout. Heaven in a glass.

The colour scheme was rather masculine, which I very much like: red and black throughout surrounded by brick walls. Large pieces of machinery peppered the decor giving it an interesting industrial tinge that I very much dug:

Light fixture

RedYetiLamp

 

Dining Room

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One thing that I really appreciate about this place is that the menu is small and uncluttered. If I’ve learned anything from Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares, it’s that most failing businesses clutter their menus with unnecessary items that they’ll never cook. Everything on the menu is (again) fresh, and made by a professional chef as well as a sous chef, and it definitely shows.

As Ashley stated, “I’m proud to be part of this establishment. We all work really hard to bring the best that we can and do what we can to make it what it is.”

She went on to describe many of her work days, which include arriving early to sort out the fresh kale and other farm fresh vegetables. I’m used to eateries such as this on Bardstown Rd. in Louisville, Kentucky, but it’s a total delight to find such a gem right around the corner here in Jeffersonville.

My guy before the Brooklyn Chocolate Stout:

Josh 1

And after:

Josh says I Love You

“Do you know what I love about you?” He asks.

“What?” I ask in return, eyeballing my stout.

Everything.”

We’ll definitely be coming back to the Red Yeti Brewing Company. 🙂

RedYeti